- Member since August 8, 2005.
- I am a girl (United States)
- When I'm not writing, I'm full time writer and student.
- I have 6 comments, 11 archived poems, 9 stories
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- [ There are many clichés about love. About how nice it is. About how it can hurt. About how teen-age lovers part ways. About how teen-age lovers stay together. ] at storywrite
There are many clichés about love. About how nice it is. About how it can hurt. About how teen-age lovers part ways. About how teen-age lovers stay together. / / You never forget your first love, they say. Truth is, you never forget any of your love - [ Cindy shivered, tucking her hands against the backs of her knees and pulling her legs closer to her chest. They’d locked her out again, and on her birthday of all occasions. It was only to outsiders that she was considered part of their family, so she at storywrite
- Of Angels and Bowling Balls at storywrite
I.
“Every angel is terrible. Every angel is terrible.” I chanted it over and over (“Every angel is terrible.") so I woul
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on Silk Roses by L.e.l., on September 24, 2005
Thank you
Thank you so much for this in-depth review. I’m sorry about your mother. You probably hear those words alot, but I know what it is like to lose some one. My great-great aunt died early this past spring, of a cause unrelated to the poem, and though I didn’t know her as well as I would have liked, I still miss her terribly.There’s really not much more I can say. Thank you for writing such a wonderful review of my piece.
Not scarey
Good, but not scarey. There are a couple places where your rhyme scheme is off. Lines 10 & 12 should rhyme. I can see that you've tried to rhyme, but it doesn't really work. Aslo, if you want to carry the same rhyme scheme through the whole poem, lines 13 and 15 need to rhyme. Other than those small details, it is a wonderful write.-Blue
language: 4, rhythm: 5, subject: 5, tone: 4, form: 3.