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Paul.Mason

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  • on Wishing Well by Windhover, on March 9, 2009
    A well sustained metaphor, a bird flying down a well
    Reminds me of the wind-up bird chronicle by Haruki Murakami
    " became infatuated with the bird" doesn't seem to fit in terms of flow and sense
    otherwise the depiction of perplexed
    experience is very recognisabl


  • on Confused by Farvardin, on March 8, 2009
    How to contain the uncontainable, accept the unacceptable?! Containing the effects of the rhyme here must have been quite difficult, well done for making it work for you
    My favourite line ... Danced through the night in the cold light of day
    I'm being harassed by my children at present so not sure of its overall effect, but certainly enjoyed reading i