- Last seen on Nov 6 6:40 AM. Member since August 5, 2005.
- I am a person from California (United States)
- When I'm not writing, I'm Court Jester.
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on First Meeting(hybridanelle in the works) by , on August 25, 2005
Looks very good to me!
I’m not familiar with this form – I’m a novice poet. But the rhyming pattern looks well executed. (I’, curious – I’ll have to look up the form and find out why the pattern is different from lines 7 thru 12, and again from lines 31 thru 38). Also, I don’t know if this is supposed to have this many stanzas, but it seems a bit lengthy for my taste. For me, when a poem gets to be too long, its starts to lose me. The ones that really grab me are the shorter ones. There could be some redundancy in this piece. I love the subject matter. Its beautiful! And your word selection couldn’t be better. My only concern is the length. But again, that could be what is required for a hybridanelle – I’m not sure. Great job! You’ve always been one of my favorite poets on AP!
. Rewarded 4


This poem dances that last dance with grace - also tears.
I've never read you before. Glad I sauntered by.
Crissy