Have I changed
Since I left school?
Have I changed at all?
Have I grown more wiser?
Do I know more about the world?
Have I grown at all?
My life doesn't seem that different
From when I was at school
Although I've changed since I was a child
I don't feel like I changed at all
I don't feel like I'm much wiser
I don't know more about the world
Though I know I've always helped
Whenever I was needed.
Author notes
This is an older poem. I am looking to go back and improve on some of them but thought it would be good to get other poet's opinions
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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Intresting subject
I really like the subject of this poem, very unusual. I would suggest thinking very carefully about your use of question marks. Mabe just at the end of every stansa in the beginging two. Make their existance powerful and meaningful. "Have I changed/ since I left school./ Have I changed at all?" It emphasises the word ALL. I hope this helps you.
language: 4, rhythm: 5, subject: 5, tone: 4, form: 3.
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i can relate
I felt this way when I finished my first year of college. Everyone tells you that you will change so much, you keep expecting some big bang, but it is too gradual to notice. Good subject.
language: 3, rhythm: 3, subject: 5, tone: 5, form: 3.
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Good form
I really like the form that you wrote this in. It is interesting and fun to read. I do have a suggestion though, I think that in you last two stanzas, instead of saying the same thing as what was said in the first two stanzas, you can essentially promote the same point, but using different words. For example, Instead of saying "My life doesn't seem that different" you could say "My life has stayed the same" or something along those lines. Just a suggestion, and I loved the poem.
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