Phoenix from the fire,
Burned in my memory,
Flying through the sky in flames coming close to set me free.
Rebirth, you bring me good news, close to heaven you ascend me,
I die just for you, so you can restore me.
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Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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Small n good
dont mind i have read many poems like that about phoneix and nothing was unique abt it exacept the symbolisation of rebirth with it in a new way.its small good but............language: 5, rhythm: 1, subject: 2, tone: 5, form: 3.
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It's okay
language: 4, rhythm: 2, subject: 3, tone: 1, form: 4.
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Thanks for the applause and the comments. X
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WOW!!!!!
this is one of the greatest short poems that i have read in my life. wow!
i can't get that word from my mind...wow!
really love this one...great job!
looking forward to read some more of the same kind of powerful poems from you.
language: 5, rhythm: 5, subject: 5, tone: 5, form: 5.
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Thank you LH for your comments. Its always a pleasure when people praise my stuff. Thank you again!!!X
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Hey,
A short and powerful poem filled with imagery leaving the reader pondering its meaning. A phoenix in its burning nest decides to dance instead of fleeing and it is consumed by the flames but only to be reborn from the ashes 500 years later, or so the story goes. Symbolizing the endless cycle of death and rebirth.
An intriguing read adorasmum
Bill
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Thanks Bill for reading my poem.X
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Captured
This poem captured (in my words) the true romantic beauty of the Phoenix! I simply loved it! It was simple but it got to the point which made it even more amazing. This is mystical poem and it is filled with so passion...Great write.....!
Love Brooklyn
aka NY
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O wow! You fit so much imagery and emotion into one short poem. This is amazing. Thank you for your poem, and I hope more like this are to come!
I myself basically obsessed with the Phoenix; she's my favorite character in the third X-men. You do very well descibing the phoenix and how you feel about it. -
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Love the Phoenix in X men too
I love that the phoenix in X men is ungovernable. I sometimes feel that way about myself, but mostly I doubt I am that complex. Thanks for reading the poem!!!
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This appeals to me, adorasmum.
It's got passion. It flies. It's got a cosmic tone that sings with a poetic voice. It's elemental in the best sense: death to life - probably the most fundamental human and spiritual experience of all. Good poem!
As I read it over repeatedly, I kept wanting to omit that word "Rebirth" as too obvious, since the whole poem is all about rebirth. But that's up to you, of course.
All in all, in 52 words, for me the poem captures something very deep in life experience, and does it with fine, flaming, shining style. And that final line is a brilliant paradox - so pardoxical that it's essentially true.
Lad -
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Thanks for the insight and comments, Lad.
I understand your comments regarding the use of the word 'rebirth'. I think I may have been overthinking that one. I was actually inspired to write this poem by the picture on Iphios' page. The phoenix is a remarkable creature which I read more about recently and was very surprised to find out was actually an Eyptian mythical creature (having always thought of it as part of Grecian/Greek mythology( for some reason).
Thanks as always, for reviewing this one.X -
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hey!
i saw this and made me look into the poem. Not to waste rewards, i think the poem has that cosmic tone...like its thundering through you.
The phoenix is my favorite "animal" or mythical creature. I have long been obsessed with its ability and have made it my mantra. Most of the pictures in my profile are of the phoenix. I just change it with another rendition of it.
your poem has a very strong tone to it. I also agree with lad about the Rebirth its kind of off.
-iphios -
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Thanks for your comments about the strong tone. I looked at the picture on your page and it moved me. Have you written a phoenix poem yet? Would like to see how you would write about this creature. Not a challenge by the way!!!!
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