Share Poetry Critiques Poetry       Forums       Freewrite       Store      

Waiting To Drown

Long ago, the water danced playfully at my feet;
tickling my toes and splashing lightly against my ankles.
Years progressed and I seemed to sink deeper.
Before long my knees were wet.
Then my thighs. My chest.
My breathing quickened as water rose around my neck.
There was nothing I could do.
My arms weighed down with bricks and my feet chained to the floor.
I had no control.
I could taste it now.
The pure intoxicating darkness on my lips.
Soon the water will rise high and envelop me completely.
I will be consumed my this darkness.
Black will pump through my veins,
and I will willingly drown.

Please tell me what you think!!

Sorry, you cannot respond to an archived poem

Reviews

  • nhewittstubbs
    August 30, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    An interetsing poem that for me, gave an intersting take on fighting against something which is taking over your life. I don't know if this is the aim of the poem, but I think that most people would relate to this poem. I really like the way vocabulary helped to develop the scene, and you have made the concept of actually drowning alluring.
    I enjoyed the poem.


  • hernandez0071
    September 4, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    scary thought?