a lone flea lands motionless
in split-second stillness
- revelation
carries torrent of speculation
to my side of the dorm -
and even more about his but
convulses quickly off
before shock-waves bounce back
escapes imminent wrath only
eye's blink away from
mind's tick-tock
to react
i counter-convulse a conastrophe
that it escaped my taloned hand.
Reviews
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Verbal pyrotechnics, I think, can often get away from a poet and bury sense. But that doesn't happen here, Pap. The verbal choices and placement, for me, are skillful and disciplined, even with so minute a split second as the landing of a flea in the poet's dorm. As in most of your other work, I see here a sharp capturing of what is almost out of time - the flea's alighting causing a tremblance in his corner, soon reflected by one in the poet's, with only a nanosecond for the poet ro react. Sort of a mini-mini time travel, along with Newton's Law of Reaction.
And the poet, in his lucid unrest, turns away from his own "con"trary action, saving that flea from a cata"strophe" of being squished by the poet's taloned hand. At least, that's my take on "conastrophe" - an interesting neologism, even if I got it wrong. Also, there seems to be an almost sci-fi quality to this poem, a twilight zone of improbability: so much happens in so little time that it's all very nearly impossible.
Nice work, pointed as the sheerest needle.
Lad -
Interesting..This one came through easier then the first
I saw your notes to Lad re: conastrophe
I love that word, definetly never seen it or heard it lol, but I love it
Very creative write, I enjoyed my friend
Cindy
Lad
January 19, 2008
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