The air you push before you
Satiates my lungs
The sound of your approaching steps
Speaks to me in tongues
The melody that plays in me
Whenever you are near
Finishes a symphony
That only I can hear
Your intoxicating aura
Your guiding hand of calm
You're at the very core of me
You make me who I am
You are my friend
My love
My life
My heart's desire you see
So all that's left for you to do
Is come and complete me
First one so please be honest and blunt!
Sorry, you cannot respond to an archived poemReviews
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This is a love poem, not one of those cliche/mushy ones ( that a right a lot of lol ) but one where love does come through more creative wording..This you have pulled off, especially with that first stanza
This had a smooth flow and I feel it is broken up in the right places
I don't think I have a criticism of it, I like it as a whole...If anything it could have more another stanza between the first and second, some more of that creative wording
but really it doesn't absolutely need it lol.
Sometimes a short piece and can say it all, not an easy task, but this does say it all
I really enjoyed this read and I look forward to reading more of your works Staunton
Cindy
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I'm not a critic but my feeling about it is that it is a warm poem. Maybe a tad sentimental, but as I said I'm a novice at this.
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Good poem...good luck
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I like the first line.
Can be interpreted spiritually or romantically.
MaMa-2-be-Cindy
January 20, 2008
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