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Induvidualism poem

You don't care about gossip and shopping
about drinking and club hopping.
Your opinions make people balk.
Nobody understands you when you talk.

You don't care about stupid popular culture
Watching people consume it like a hungry vulture.
You don't even watch TV,
You're not what the corporate media wants you to be.

You see everyone else with their TV, shopping and beer,
Their possessions the only thing they hold dear.
You wonder why most people are so shallow,
And why their minds are so limited and narrow.

People ask you why you're the way you are,
How come you don't want to be an American Idol star.
You just grunt and say, "It's all good."
You got used to being misunderstood.

Your friends say, "Lighten up." They don't want to hear
About the ideas and books you hold so dear.
In public you dare to read,
And won't babble the latest self-help creed.

You can't relate
To your friend's latest "sexy date."
Talk to Sexy and find they have nothing to say.
They look great, but stay away.

You can't relate to the loudmouth jocks and Stepford Wives,
with their store-bought brains and store-bought lives.
The suburbs: ladn of perfectly manicured lawns,
Land of drug addicts and a million yawns.

You got used to being alone.
In you, a seed of individuality was sown.
You long for someone intelligent to talk to.
To find them, miles and miles you search through.

You don't have a religion, you don't go to church
Because you made an ardous spiritual search
And found that prayers are just wasted breath
Something to help people cope with the inevitability of death.

You wonder if your better off being alone,
Tired of suburbanites who brag about the cost of their home.
You wonder if dumb people are happier,
If you would be better off being superficial and sappier.

You long to be judged not on how much money you make,
You realize our consumer culture is so damn fake.

Finding kindred souls is like the Quest for the Holy Grail.
People who will let you rant and rail
About what a dumb, superficial culture this is,
Who understand you're not a Mrs, but a Miss.

Author notes

What can I improve about this poem?
Is it too heavy-handed? Are the lyrics too long to support the rhymes?

What do I need to improve? Imagery? Rhyming scheme? How can I make this more "poetic?"

    : Comment:

Comments

  • Done
    February 17, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    I read this earlier(hell, I read all your work earlier)

    and I gotta say hurray!!!

    You are my kindred sister spirit and I am here to scarily glom onto you and your genius with sycophantic neediness. You're super-duper.

    There, I said it. And no, I don't care if you need to lose a thousand pounds(loved your author notes). Your writing rocks and is right up my alley.

    Oh, and just so you needn't be concerned...I'm well aware of the fact that you're a woman and I'm a man and no, I'm not flirting with you. I just thought your style is nifty and I couldn't help but say so. I do that...often...speak my mind and stuff...so sue me.

    You won't getta dime...

    It's nice to have you here. Now that I have suffused you with heady rhetoric you may feel free to go and write a terd of a poem due to the anxiety of replicating your past performance that I have so glowingly showered with praise.

    Cheers, ladyjanew. And welcome to the site.

    al


    p.s. I am rarely this glowing, but I thought your writing was really neato and stuff. Such things need to be said. Now, please don't feel the need to shower me with a reciprocity of praise. I don't operate like that. Please...find a p.o.s. poem of mine and rip me a new one. That'd make me feel right at home.