A/N: If you are unacquainted with Reuter's photojournalist Dan Eldon, please take a few moments to view the following YouTube videos. You may find yourself forever changed:
Part 1: http://youtube.com/watch?v=ZxxgetWUi1o
Part 2: http://youtube.com/watch?v=wZQWX5tGZFs
INTO AFRICA
Africa was never my itinerary,
the route clearly marked on my ancestral map of Ireland,
spread out on the floor like a patchwork quilt
so I could smooth out the crinkly creases
that never folded up the same way twice.
My eyes drifted toward Africa
and I saw your face gazing back at me
from old photographs I’d seen in books,
your hair and smile so present I felt
I could stretch my hand through time
and gently touch them.
I wanted to trace the boyish curves and lines
of your cheekbones and shoulders
now embraced only by paper borders.
I look at your journals
and colors shoot out like kaleidoscope flashes,
imprinting pictures onto my retinas.
You didn't see me watching you
through the time lens of my mind
as you worked your secret alchemy
with paints and brushes,
composing with tape and glue the detritus of your day
that lay scattered on the floor,
your feet scuffing and rearranging it yet again.
Your translucent form shimmers above images
that capture your spirit like a camera.
Moving across the pages,
my fingers trekked savannas and canoed rivers
and, when I looked at them,
instead of my own whorled prints
I saw the dark contours of Africa
inked into the tips
like black tattoos that wouldn’t come off.
You invite us into your fire circle
as if you are some tribal elder
imparting ancient wisdom from the gods.
I folded my map, turned away from Ireland,
and crossed into Africa.
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What did you like or not like? What could be improved?
Sorry, you cannot respond to an archived poemReviews
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Whoever Eldon is, Dannan, you've done him a rich tribute here in words about his art, his humanity and his spirit. Those italicized stanzas, especially, bring me as a reader into his persona, his love of Africa, and how that continent melded into him, and he into it.
I very much liked your set-up in the first stanza, your Irish homeland traced on a map in your own soul. And then you take the reader, like me, on a journey, not "out of Africa" but deeply into it through your sensuous thoughts and feelings coming out of Eldon's photos and art. Lovely poem altogether, and strong - it is nostalgia that is confident in its judgments, not weepy or overly sentimental. For that reason, it rings true, it has emotional integrity as a poem of remembrance. Really nice work for me to enjoy!
My only suggestion is to minor I hesitate to say it: perhaps that "on" in the poem's first line might be unnecessary? It's removal might make the poet's soul as much a part of her country as Eldon's was to his. Just a thought about a very finely crafted poem.
Later...
Lad -
Unmistakeable quality
I don't know this artist you address but this is a terrific tribute to him. Anyone who can make you trade Ireland for Africa must HAVE something! Too much here to pick out ALL the good bits but I particularly liked the map that wouldn't fold the same way twice (is there any other kind!) and the penultimate stanza. Also the inked tatoos that wouldn't come off. Didn't quite 'get' the italics and unless you have a good reason for them I'd rate them a distraction. The quality of your writing is unmistakeable. Are you published? If not, what hope for the rest of us? Good write. >W< -
I had no knowledge of this artist..your write, a touching in ways trbute, deidcation to someone you admire..taught me a lot..made me want to know even more...that is gifted writing on your part.
A wonderful enlightening story told within your words and it was throughly enjoyed
Cindy
. Rewarded 6
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wow! i also am a descendent of Ireland with a deep interest in AFrica.....lovely verse. yes it is a captivating land. great subject matter. well crafted verse
. Rewarded 4
Lad
April 7, 2008
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