Piercing morning mist
Singing black bird, swaying branch
Breath of creation
Thinking thought laughter
The song of a thousand birds
Let go and enjoy
Will never get it
Created the universe
The discerning mind
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Reviews
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No time of the day can show us the breath of creation better than the tranquil early morning. Then, we can think of it also in terms of life where the morning perhaps is a new beginning, a decision for change, a courageous step forward to the unknown.
When we open the heart and mind the song of a thousand birds will nourish our soul and enter our discerning mind. This poem is very pithy, grants wisdom and insight and spreads so much hope. At least it is what it grants me and I thank you, Bill. Best wishes, Ulla xx -
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Thanks Ulla!
What a wonderful comment! Thanks a lot and Im glad you enjoyed it. Havent been on this site for a while but Ill be sure to stop by your place and check out your latest
Bill
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I enjoyed it, Bill. To begin with, I am always intrigued by the 5-7-5 pattern and, having played with it myself a few times, always enjoy seeing what others do with it. In this example, I see a poem that is quite dynamic... it could mean many things to different people I suspect. For me, I came away with a sense of creation as a simple, natural event... not a big bag, but the song of a bird. It brought me back to a very elemental understanding of nature an I enjoyed that. I have a feeling my reaction may be fairly unique, but that is okay. I really enjoyed reading this one and thank you for sharing it. That picture is a bit creepy, too!
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Thanks Mark
I find creation a very interesting phenomena. There is a creative aspect to existence but theistic religions have made an interesting twist to extract this aspect and project it onto an entity that is completely external to the universe. I feel that creation is something that happens naturally and continually. We “create” every moment from our lives by the decisions we make.
Glad you liked this one Mark. Ill be by and check out your work over the weekend
Bill
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good
I am trying to picture the birds song piercing through the mist.The emotion is strong and Gods creative brush has painted it all for us to see.You only live once so enjoy the moment and live life to the full. Morning is the time when the muse inspires and This poem has inspired me and i want to laugh and sing with gay abandon.Wonderful poem.
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Thanks
Im glad that you were moved by the poem
Bill
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hey bill
not being a usual fan of formal poetry forms b/c I simply do not know them, I'd have to say I'm still intrigued by what was done here. I myself not being a morning person either really made this a weird one for me to like, but I still respect the beauty of the morning, I think that helped out, and you paint such a beautiful portrait of it, how can I not want to hear this bird's song in the morning, unless I'm trying to sleep?? LoL but who needs sleep when we can replace it with the beauty of the world. Great picture by the way.
TTYL
MM
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Thanks,
Mornings are special. Especially a nice spring/summer morning in the woods. We have black birds by our house, they are nice to hear in the morning, but as you mentioned, not when you are trying to sleep!
Thanks for your comment MM
Bill
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Quite like this one Bill.
We get a lot of singing birds here were we are in the monrings etc..it frustrates my prtner to ll hell...but me...I love it and find the soundsa, almost peaceful
I like the...breath of creation and that it is there in the poem aswell.
Is this a string of haikus?..cause it has the syllable count of a haiku ( well in most parts ), so I wonder.
The image there with the poem...well when I saw it I instantly thought , how interesting, not something you see everyday, lol.
Then yours words followed and suited it so well. But I also felt these were truly your own words...thoughts inspired form such a picture.
Or maybe you just found a pic to mtch the words and I have it all wrong lol
Either way , who cares...I enjoyed another very well written piece from you
Cindy
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Thanks Cindy
Yes, it is a string of Haikus. I really like tempo of 3 Haikus in a row. Plus, it forces me to boil the poem down to its essence.
It is a strange pic, I wrote the poem first then found the pic.
Thanks for your comment Cindy, it is always a pleasure
Bill
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I havent written a string of three but I could see it feeling so much more complete then one..It is truly hard to perfect a haiku in my opinion, so having more then one helps
Glad you answered the question on the pic...I felt you had found it first..So am glad to know the facts behind it all lol
Thanks Bill
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interesting
I found your poem really interesting,
talking about the early morning, the sound of the black bird, the movement of variance in the early morning thoughts.
Realizing the very idea of creation around with a simple idea to celebrate the nature's creation around us.
This life should be celebrated as we will never get it again and amidst all these thoughts a sensitive mind is rich in observing the sensory responses of his own and the world around him.
All your words have one thread in the transparent thoughts that is life while they join in to make this poem.
The whole write carries a distinct space for the reader to fill in his thoughts while he or she reads in.
This is what I experienced through the words.
khushboo -
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Thanks Khushboo,
Sorry that I havent replied sooner. I have been very busy lately. Thanks a lot for your insightful comment, Khushboo. I really appreciate it.
Bill
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Singing the beauty of nature
The first thing that strikes me is the intriguing image of the red-winged blackbird with smoky breath issuing from its beak - a perfect complement to the poetic theme. Your use of alliteration is very creative and lends the quality of bird song to the poem. Nice work!
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Thanks
Glad you enjoyed this one.
Bill
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purple esprit
April 17