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Aspen

sidewalk finches peck
big sis rations granola
brother's cupped hands beg

...

Middleton smoke wafts
tongue smoothes mint chocolate block
double-shot adieu





























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Reviews


  • William McGarvey
    April 22, 2008

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    Good,

    Very sharp imagery in this poem. I like the twin haiku concept, it works very well here.

    Nice read
    Bill


  • Papyrus
    April 22, 2008
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    < all about quality

    Caliente,

    heh. thanx. these are some of those lame coffee shop haikus...

    if you smoke Black and Mild's or a pipe, then you would have caught my Middleton pipe tobacco plug. - a good smoke goes great with dark chocolate and a double-shot of, yes, espresso.

    watching the chillin feed finches was a plus,

    Pap


  • MaMa-2-be-Cindy
    April 26, 2008

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    Tight haiku (s) Papy

    Perfect imagery..birds pecking while sister rations the food..

    I got the feel of you writing this from a seat a coffee shop etc..I think the entire feel and the double shot gave that feeling to me...Am I right or not, lol

    I guess middleton is a reference to a town or sumthing....but do get the smoke wafts is indeed smoke wafting.

    Really like this set of haikus...doesnt need more...doesnt need less..Just right


    Cin