How can you expect me to understand
when all I do is cry?
I see your love has come to an end,
you shut your eyes on me.
I can't say that I love you
because that would be a lie.
You meant everything to me
and now you're just 'that guy'.
Silent screams break through the air.
I'm wishing, I'm waiting.
Take me from here.
I never knew you,
the real you.
Just live this lie for me.
I want this all to disappear,
your lies and long goodbyes.
These tears I cry
were all for you,
but now I know
this us is through.
I can't believe
you tricked me, so.
I thought your love would never go,
it was ours to grow.
Don't say goodbye to me now,
just live this lie for me.
I really wonder how
this lie will end for me.
Author notes
This is just a roughy and it isn't even done yet, but I still want to know what you think about it so far.
what do you think?
Comments
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Love It!!
I am a huge fan of your poetry!Each and every word in and of itself is a drop of gold!! This poem is amazing. The second stanza has got to be my favorite part. It is so hard hitting and true! I feel the same way about the rest of the poem as well. I loved when you said, "Silent screams break through the air." The wording is wonderful. I'm curious to see what you might add too it.... As usuall, Fantastic!!!
Sarah

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Great job!
Thank you for commenting on my Awfully Unfortunate Adventures poem. I was pissed off when I wrote that, and I needed to write to get out my anger.
I loved this poem! You expresssed the heartache of a breakup better than I ever could. The images are clear and the language is great: simplle and direct. I liked the rhyming scheme of you/lie/me/guy. Where you trying to write rhyming poetry, or free verse? This seems like a combination of the two.
Great job! And thanks for commenting on TAUAOPPOP!

language: 5, rhythm: 4, subject: 5, tone: 5, form: 4.


