I met my true love over the phone one day
I knew I loved her right away
Her voice had an unusual sort of twang
I knew it’d be beautiful if she ever sang
We sat there talking for half the night
I began to imagine what she looked like
I pictured her being five foot eight or five foot nine
She sounded like she’d look really fine
I imagined her having long flowing blonde hair
ending just above her derriere
She’d have a pearly white smile and deep blue eyes
The kind that keep you mesmerized
Not to mention she would be thin
Not much more than probably one hundred and ten
Her skin would be smooth and soft to the touch
I loved her accent and couldn’t get enough
We both admitted it stunk being alone
Then it came time to hang up the phone
I was sad to let go even though I knew
I’d meet her face to face in a day or two
When the day came that we finally met
I was a bit surprised I have to admit
She was almost exactly the way I had thought
Well, to be honest I was a little bit off
She wasn’t as tall as I thought she would be
She was about four foot two or maybe four foot three
I was right about her having long flowing hair
There was a patch hanging down over each ear
It was no longer blonde; it had turned to light gray
I had to think of something to say
I complimented her on her beautiful blue eyes
Though I was sure one was glass and not the right size
It was then that she flashed me a shy little smile
As for being pearly, well I had been right
She must have polished her one tooth all night
As for her weight, well what can I say?
One hundred and ten was the weight of one leg
Her skin however would be smooth to the touch
It would have to be… it was stretched tight enough
As we sat there talking I became sad once again
Because a woman that hot would only want to be Friends!
Author notes
I wrote this for someone I met over the phone. She said her friends kept telling her to join an internet dating service. She said if she did she would describe herself as four foot three and three hundred or so pounds with one tooth. I said I thought that would cut down on the "Barbiedoll" seekers. She said that was the plan.
Isn't true love a wonderful thing?
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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I love the humor in this! great job
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Humor? Where?
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Great read
I really enjoyed this from the beginning to the end, what a concept. I liked hearing your take on what you thought she would be and what she presented as. This poem was again laced with your signature humor which i truly enjoy every time I read you, an enjoyable read throughout!
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Thank you
I'm glad you enjoyed it. Is that not the way it usually goes? You talk to someone and you get this preconceived notion of what they look like and then when you meet them they aren't even close to what you imagined. Of course they may not be as drastically different as the beautiful long lady in this poem...
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damn ace!
at first, i didnt really like it, the ryhme felt a little forced, and I suppose it just glazed over my mind, but when the angle of the poem changed, ie "when you met her" i sincerly thought it was pure gold. the ryhme was awesome, and the humour was just, perfect. in whole, just damn aceeeeeeeee!
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Thank you so kindly
I can understand the glazing over. So many love poems. Isn't she lovely? Thanks again for the awesome compliment.
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hey Brian
LoL this one was pretty funny, and it was still poetically written well. Very nice job, you provided some good imagery giving a good idea of what you imagined you would get and what you really ended up with. Nice jobe LoL
language: 3, rhythm: 3, subject: 3, tone: 3, form: 3.
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Thanks,
I'm glad you enjoyed it. This is one of my favorites. Isn't that the way it usually is? You get this preconceived idea of what the person looks like only to find out you're not even close.
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Lol, that's funny, and I get the meaning. It doesn't matter if you're the ugliest person in the world, people would fight over you if you were the nicest person in the world.
Very sweet.
- A.C.
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Thank you
Humor and a moral all wrapped up together. Yeah! You got it. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Unless they are shallow people love you for who you are.
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