Rhythmic strumming in the back,
Barely audible over the voices.
I slowly weave through the sea,
People on every side.
As I get closer I see some moving,
Swaying, swinging to the sounds.
Subconsciously it seems to me,
They do not realize they are dancing.
A background distraction with,
Such control over their movement.
Closer still I get, finally
People moving around in front.
A lone man setting the mood,
The rhythm of the night.
Sensual tones underlying the,
Alcohol-driven sambas.
Suddenly, realizing I too move,
One cannot stop this.
Through the night I sway,
From one side to the other.
The theraputic aura,
Music bringing me back.
No doctor could prescribe,
This feeling of release.
Author notes
Not sure how this one reads.... let me know!
Comments
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It reads seductively :)
this poem draws you into dancing much like slow, hypnotic music seduces me into subconscious movement when the song makes my body sway of its own volition.
One minor point - in L6 'swinging' seems too sudden and energetic so may I suggest 'Swaying softly to the sounds'.
I love the last stanza, particularly the last two lines 'No doctor could prescribe, This feeling of release' because it describes how I feel when I dance
Monica
language: 5, rhythm: 5, subject: 5, tone: 5, form: 5.
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