It started in my soul, doctor
when it severed the sane cells in my brain
with shards of my ribcage
then my heart climbed up my windpipe
and took a leap of no faith
into the mad cells that remained
There was anarchy and perpetual war, doctor
among my brain cells
as the rulers preached,propagated
then murdered the ignorant
as sick and twisted fantasies
dictated the actions of the worker cells
The psychiatrist cell went schizo
as my last rational cell decided to end the war
with three bottles of vodka and several pills
Some days passed me by, doctor
until I felt capable of looking at
another human being without vomiting
then my doorbell rang so I answered it.
I thought the lady from upstairs
was collecting for a funeral wreath
using a silver biscuit tin as a money box
so I searched for cash and found a fiver
but the tin that she held
changed into a small golden crib
so I enquired as to her needs
She started to talk, doctor
but my eyes were diverted
and my listening became irrelevant
as I noticed her blue veil
made her look like the Virgin Mary
then she hitched up her dress
so I asked her inside
but she just stood there
as I saw my own heart
coming out of her mouth
then she lifted her dress over her head
She was naked underneath,doctor,
and it was then that I saw
the head of baby Jesus
sticking out between her legs,
it was veiny,
blotchy, grey, bruised
then it looked right at me
and told me to......
It was horrible,doctor,
I didn`t mean to kill her
but the baby Jesus told me to,
what else was I supposed to do,doctor?
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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This was a very powerful poem about mental illness. You did a good job of showing what a person goes through with mental illness.
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Reality Strikes
This is a wonderful poem. I will read this again many times. It is so true in how it happens. I have witnessed those on that other side of sanity or should I say, insanity. I have known people with this disorder and I am deeply affected by this poem. I have even seen the consequences of their actions when their actions were considered inappropriate. Excellent write.
Birdie
language: 5, rhythm: 4, subject: 5, tone: 5, form: 4.
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Hey Birdie,thank you,i`m sorry to read about what you have witnessed,i have also been directly affected,i have a family member who suffers with a severe mental illness,this was meant to be quite shocking,not because i like shocking people,rather to hopefully bring awareness to this illness as it can strike anyone at any time
Regarding the poem,the sick murderer is actually thinking up an alibi for his "crime" that he will later use tell the doctor
see you soon
rhet
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Engaging. Indeed Schizo. I like how you kept us aware of the setting by repeating "doctor." The story delivered by the client was incredible. It felt sane, but the turn of events were insane. I found it vivid, i could imagine the scene really well. It's morbid, but I enjoyed the unraveling and twist that this poem offered.
-iphios -
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Hi iphios,thanks for the read and comment..i`ve got this theory that we should be encouraged to understand our dark and sick side as much as our loving and kind one,deep down i think we all have "mad" thoughts but we have been conditioned to suppress them due to human ignorance..if there was more investment
given to understanding the inate existence of our dark side rather than investing in medicines that simply prevent it from getting worse then i believe that fewer people would develop full blown mental illness
just a thought
thanks iphios
rhet
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