Hiked
a couple miles in
a few more miles out
everywhere lay quiet snow.
Stopped
in the middle
maybe closer to the start than the end
the frozen brook meandering
come down from the peak
to lie about the clearing.
Dwarfed
ponderosas gusting
sweet smelling sap from
earthen blood pooled
threw arms around their girth.
Whiffed
nose buried in the red cracks
found a home in the forest
in the snow banks a hermitage.
Author notes
Went for a hike yesterday.
Sore today.
Comments
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Amazing imagery, your descriptions are spot on and allow the reader to visualize and sense all that you were trying to display
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I love the imagery, especially the description of the ponderosas.
sweet smelling sap from
earthen blood pooled
threw arms around their girth.
The ending is wonderful. I enjoy your writing so much...
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Strange in a great way
I'm having a definite visceral reaction to this one, but I'm not sure what it is. "Sweet smelling sap from earthen blood pooled": I LOVE that. Terrific sensory paradox.language: 4, rhythm: 4, subject: 5, tone: 5, form: 2.
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Thank you!
Intrinsic is what we aim for (royal we). Ambiguity's generally what we get.
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