The man in first class
wore a suit and read a newspaper
He departed the train
and drove to his home
where his wife was cooking
and their three children
were doing their homework
He embraced his wife
and his children called out
Daddy Daddy Daddy
They shared a prayer
but he never cared
and tick tick tick tick...
The man in second class
wore jeans and listened to music
He departed the train and walked home
where his wife was shouting
and their three children
were watching television
He argued with his wife
and his children called out
Mummy Mummy Mummy
They began to swear
the fight wasn`t fair
and tick tick tick tick...
The man in the penitentiary
wore a number and studied his rights
He stayed in a cell
and thought about home
where his wife was cooking
and their three children
were doing their homework
He phoned his wife
and his children cried out
Daddy Daddy Daddy
He began to care
when released from there
and tick tick tick tick...
Comments
-
great job man. wow. its really powerful, very descriptive. i love the format, the repetition though slightly different each time. speaks volumes about humanity.
-
Your poem makes me think of one thought in particular: You shouldn't judge others (not by the clothes they wear, not by the work they do, not by where they live)--you shouldn't judge people, period
Birdie
language: 5, rhythm: 4, subject: 5, tone: 4, form: 4.
-
-
Exactly Birdie, exactly!!
Thank you
bye
rhet
-
Adding your comment:
