Unconditional
is no matter what
I don't care
It's irrevelent
to me
Whatever, whenever
it'll always be fine
Crying in my room
alone
Because you don't
care but
I always will
forever and ever
an awfully long
time
the worst you can
do will hurt
but it won't
change the way
I care
Author notes
This took me a couple tries and I'm still not sure how it worked out...
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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This has such...unconditional
feeling in it. You can really express a thousand emotions in little words. It's really heartfelt, too. The ending is also really good. Also, should 'irrevelent' in line 4 be 'irrelevant'?
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Lots better then the original. Good job. It's a sweet, heartfelt poem. Love it.
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Well Written but Sad
This is another wonderful write its full of hurt and bitterness both very normal feeling that we all get
One point I really like is your ending I'm not sure if you meant to do it but your ending its really well broken into thoughts I found it really stuck out to me.
My Favorite Stanza was:
"I always will
forever and ever
an awfully long
time
the worst you can
do will hurt
but it won't
change the way
I care"
Distant Unknown
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Thank you so much!
-S
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You're confuzzling me. You have two Unconditionals!! You might wanna change the titles... Anyway...
It's good. It's sorta angry, sorta... i don't know... pleading(?) But I think I like it. Nice tweaking from the 1st one.
Keep it up!
Himmel -
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Yes, my cmputer had a slight malfuncction and somehow my edit turned into two poems... however tha works out. This is the important one though.
-S -
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:-P
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