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Prey

PREY





Antennae pick up the tremors in your voice –
Sense the strain - know that you are struggling
Against the power of your weakening –
Keeping your defences up – juggling.
Your laugh – a bit too quick – a little shrill,
Betrays you – and a thrill, deep and dull is stirred .
Something dark raises its head and sniffs the air –
Is there blood on it? Should it check the herd?

A predator to something wounded drawn
moves to the beat of an African drum.
The herd becomes restless – unsettles to move on.
But the straggler moves slower – looks back.
The drum beats faster now – but time slows down .
The Serengeti broody with attack .

I thought a cat-and-mouse game we’d begun.
But I know better now – know why you run.
This is no game.
And if I should find your straggling, wounded heart
Alone and in the open –
Then I must tear it – and my own – apart.
So I keep a cage door locked…..
.

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Reviews


  • February 26, 2006
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    i like it

    b4 commenting on ur poem i would like to recomend to change either the ackground color or the font's color coz i had to select the text to be able to read it maybe white instead of red is better or black...anway coming to ur poem i guess this is a gr8 subjet to write abt which made me realize that not only animals can be preys only we "people" are treated like preys...it is nice one and interesting and yes it kinda does feel tense while reading i imagined that i was watching "Animal planet"channel good job

    . Rewarded 4


    • Windhover silver member
      February 26, 2006
      Edit | Reply

      Thanks !

      Thanks for taking the time and for the kind words YouLi and sorry about the text colours - I couldn't seem to edit them once I'd picked them.I'll return you a critique on one of your own poems.


  • March 1, 2006
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    Great

    I really like this a lot... it communicates tons and the visual imagery is wonderful... the conflict continues through and builds to a peak in the last verse but it still leaves a question for the audience to take and make their own... great!

    . Rewarded 4