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Cycling

CYCLING



Gentle rhythm , easy motion
Miles and miles of tarmac ocean
Reeled in underneath my wheels
How bumpy- smooth , how good it feels !

Air and rubber , man and metal  .
Hand on handle , foot on pedal .
Up and down the pedals go –
Down and up the road below .


Getting somewhere , going nowhere .
Miles to go but time to get there .
Where I`m going`s my beginning –
Just the doing is the winning .

Now with effort , then with glide
A small life-cycle in each ride .
Energy , sublimely burned ,
With God's own interest - returned !

Any bike riders out there?

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Reviews


  • Windhover silver member
    March 12, 2006
    Edit | Reply

    < How about this?

    Thanks for the nice comment and the feedback ,Al. Since you're not the first person to have doubts about the last line I've slightly modified it , making  a small change to the previous line to allow for it.Your comment shows you 'get' what I'm trying to say which is great- but its not flowing somehow- right? The idea here is my favourite one of the poem ( apart from 'tarmac ocean' ) and I really want it to stick .I tried your suggestion but if you read it out loud you'll see it has 2 beats too many , though it does make the message clearer.Hopefully the compromise I came up with helps. Thanks for taking the time !

  • The Pole Star
    March 14, 2006
    Edit | Reply

    Excellent

    Though, I am not a bike rider but my poetry is. I think so I have some poetry of mine here based upon the sports only...
    This is an excellent write, yeah! not to forget, exceptional also. This is a very smooth and flowing...just like a bike...if u watch Indian films...for u...Dhoom! (a famous movie on bikes)
    And yes, as far as the poem is concerend, this is brilliance...applause.
    And what a rhyme?
    You really ahve done great justice with it...great write up!
    And yeah! u ahve the best rating so far!

    . Rewarded 4


    • Windhover silver member
      March 14, 2006
      Edit | Reply

      Wow! I think my head is swelling!

      There is a wise old saying that says
      'Out of the mouths of children and babies comes the truth' - now would be a good time for me to remind the world of it! And thank you for your kind comment !


  • Special VAT
    March 19, 2006
    Edit | Reply

    Oh good

    Really nice one buddy, you know real nice, made me think about a few things within me.


  • Lonely Traveller
    March 22, 2006
    Edit | Reply

    Wonderfull

    i am not a bike rider, but reading the poem gives a feel of it. keep writing ---- its awesome!


    • Windhover silver member
      March 22, 2006
      Edit | Reply

      Thank You So Much!

      Glad you liked it .It's nice that a poem about cycling should 'travel'! I read some of your work and its quality makes your comment even more flattering ! I will try to return this compliment soon .   Best Regards    W.