Those critters I stuffed into crates
- with grade school keepsakes,
Dismissed as kid stuff,
I hear groaning on windy evenings
- and scratching at the attic window panes.
Scratching and tapping, disguised as oak branches.
But I know better.
They lurk in shadowy crevices
- as the grandfather clock chimes two
- - or a little more.
They tap a code to those initiated into the
- secrets of the survival of childhood.
Be wary of the creatures
- who nibble on the toes of
- - unblanketed feet,
- who stretch the nose
- - of the tyke who fibs,
- who beguile the innocent into evil doings
- - to tease them after with unspeakable guilt,
- who lurk in ambush of the child trembling her way
- - to the potty in the dead of night
And who, I know, will lead the parade
- bearing my coffin unto the graveyard.
Comments?
Sorry, you cannot respond to an archived poemReviews
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It's been a pleasure
Hey eosmia,
You hit the nail square on the head with this one. This is an excellent poetic capture of those rare lucid moments when our chest is full and ripe with powerful feeling that we want to share but rarely can do it justice. Yes, I have felt these things. Especially when going through old things from the past. My feet just carried my parade master to the grave. I requested that I have his box of old watches. As a boy I would sneak into his room and go through this box, looking at his treasure trove of old timepieces. Everytime I hold one of those watches it takes me back and fills my heart full of cotton fluffy stuff of wistfulness. You touch on these emotions here and I love it. This was very well done and one of the best I have read. Thanks for this. This takes me back in the same way as my father's old time-pieces. Thank you. This spoke to me so powerfully I have no desire to correct for fear it would lose any feeling.
Al. Rewarded 4
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What a terribly large heart must reside witin your breast.
What else could I ask for, Thank you. I've been wanting to ask about other poetry sites. Can you suggest any?
E. -
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It's been a pleasure.
I haven't tried any others but am considering it due to an incessant troll problem here. The only other I've tried is All Poetry and I was sorely disappointed by the the profuse amount of teen angst and glad handing without any concrete reviewing.
I am currently looking though and I'll let you know if I find something comparable.
Oh and hey, thanks for the compliment. Now, if only my head didn't match in size I might be a well-balanced individual. All too often my big head causes me to topple over and impale my terribly large heart. I am locked in eternal endeavor at cranial reduction.
Thanks,
Al
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i do!
makes me think about a lot about childhood and the endless wishing i was back to it! This is really great eosmia! I loved it.
Im just wondering if the dashes were put there on purpose. It kinda distracted me a bit. On the 2nd read however, it seems like but a part of the "childhood critters" lol.
Thanks for this. I'm so glad you have taken me back to those wonderful days.
Best regards!
Lynne. Rewarded 4
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DAMN!!!!!!
i think the indentions and dashes add to the poem. this poem is amazing. it captures everything beautiful about childhood and sends the reader through a brutally twisted revisit to their own life. this is easily one of the best poems ive read. thank you eosmia. Rewarded 4
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My Goodness...
I had to catch my breath after reading that one..
This is truly a deep peice, and I loved reading it.
I can find no fault in this, nor anything of which there is to improve.
Thank you so much for posting this and allowing us to read it.
Beautiful.
Aileen C. Kendall. Rewarded 4
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I Remember!
This is a beautiful work! Its one of those where after you read it you have to stop and think for a minute because you have all these thoughts and memories rushing in. I loved it! Bravo!. Rewarded 4
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Ahh nice.
You clearly portray the resurgence of childhood fears in adulthood - perhaps old age? In any case, the irony of a grown-up believing in these things highlights their power.
The "scratching and tapping" "oak branches" of line 6 are particularly evocative, as well as the creatures that nibble the unblanketed toes. Your words are terse and closely-chosen. The result is a tight, cohesive expression of nostalgic psychotic polyphobia.
The indentations certainly help the poem along, but I don't understand why you have the dashes there. As placeholders for the tabs, perhaps?. Rewarded 4
June 3, 2006