- Member since February 17, 2009.
- I am a 18 year old person
- I have 4 comments, 2 archived poems
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Done : Hey, on February 27, 2009I was looking forward to commenting on your work, but your writes are now archived, where no comment can reach them. Please pull them out so I can make good on my word; I'd appreciate that. I liked your writes the first time I read them(I don't show up on the read counter because I like my privacy) and had been ruminating on them so as to do them justice, as a lot of thought had obviously gone into them. Please, do put them back out.
al
Comments
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on untitled by , on February 17, 2009
Strange in a great way
I'm having a definite visceral reaction to this one, but I'm not sure what it is. "Sweet smelling sap from earthen blood pooled": I LOVE that. Terrific sensory paradox.language: 4, rhythm: 4, subject: 5, tone: 5, form: 2.

Classically very solid
The short lines are indeed highly effective, as is the heightened sense of something wrong, something ineffably off. The archaic spelling here and there I like: adds to the general tone. Great metaphors, great structure...very nice. Oh, were you to check out either of my poems (I'm new), that would be a huge favour...language: 5, rhythm: 2, subject: 4, tone: 4, form: 5.