She's a hairdresser.
It isn't brain surgery-
it's head therapy
Free!
psyche evaluation with every
colour-rinse
and tea
and since you're a regular
chocolate biscuits
one lump or two?
some common sense with that?
I come here for a chat
as much as anything else.
I always wash my hair before I come
but I love to let her do it again
her fingers and thumbs
and the hot water come drumming
strumming my tingling scalp
soothing touch of comb and brush
the assured snip-snip
of the scissors
in her firm but gentle grip
and me as well
the humanity of such
touch
these chairs make me slouch
but they're far more comfortable
than that other couch
In a list
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 13 of 13
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Ooooh, John, this one's fun, but I detect something a little dark here with that last line. I love that the opening lines both mimic and poke fun at common adverts. Then the turning point in lines 12 and 13 lead into something a little more introspective. I, too, always wash my hair before I go in for a cut, but let them do it again anyway because I enjoy the sensation.
"The humanity of such touch"-- that line speaks volumes.
And the final lines-- I sense some self-effacement with your usual brand of irony. We writers live too much in our heads sometimes. It's good to get out and talk to hairdressers, bar tenders-- hell, even the cashier at the grocery store.
This is a really great write-- tight lines, concise, witty, but full of humanity and the reality of loneliness.
-Pie
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Hey Cutie! Thanks for reading and commenting so astutely as always. You picked up on all the points as usual. The last lines perhaps sound a little more dramatic than intended, having made room for rhyme and form (haiku) I think the practice of human beings grooming one another is becoming rarer and rarer, especially for men. When I watch apes picking and scratching at one another I realize it's something we're probably programmed to do at a primal level. So the 'therapy' of the hairdressers is probably underrated. I just remembered an image by Bukowski of one of his women who loved to squeeze the zits on his back. It's ugly , but it gets the point across.Anyway, so glad you liked it and graced it with a comment. >W<
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I Can't Put My Finger...
...on what it is, exactly, but I really like this poem. I love the unstructured rhyme; the way they seemingly pop out of nowhere -- sort of like the caraway seeds in rye bread, but not like that at all. It tells a nice story, of sorts.
All the pieces are good, but the total is greater than the sum of those parts, for me. Nice.
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If you grip the hair beween your middle fingers an use them to guide the scissors....
... sorry Noodle! Couldn't resist! Rhymes usually do just 'pop out' with me and I prefer to leave them as they fall than contrive them, so , glad you noticed it and that you liked it. My Best. Windhover.
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Today is my day of reading rather different but nice poetry. And yours joins the list. Its a refreshing change from the usual. I like your style. You've made the regular hair dressersa job sound quite fascinating...almost an art. Loved the beginning and end....and the middle too. Wouldn't do anything to change it.
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Thank You Charoo
I wrote it in my notebook as I sat waiting for an appointment. I've often thought lots of people probably go to the hairdressers even when they don't need to, just for the lovely feeling of gentle touch and being pampered and the conversation with the hairdresser. The first lines just kind of 'popped out' as Haiku, so I contrived to finish with another one. So pleased you liked it.
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I'm sensing a decidedly sexual undertone to this poem. I could be completely wrong and it's just my dirty mind! I'm going to try and critique, although I think this one is fabulous! Now that I read through it again I can't think of anything! I'd like a little more grammar in it but I think with modern poetry it doesn't matter so much. I'm an old fashioned kind of gal myself.
I love the rhythm to this, and the seperation between the first three lines and the last three lines give perfect cause for thought.
Brilliant write my dearie!
Your Silver Scintilator! (bags I that word!)
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No sex intended...
..just your dirty mind, I'm afraid! But getting your hair washed, cut and blow dried, is a truly sensual experience! I keep mine short!
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Haikould You?
Blast! Missed the haiku bits aswell you wily old buzzard! -
it made me smile
I like the very light rhyme, the images, assonance, and the overall tone. I would just like to point out that "chocolate" is spelled wrong. Otherwise, I wouldn't change it. It makes me want to go get my hair cut now... -
2nd comment
Jeez, Bird, I just realized that I missed the string of haiku gems flowing along and syllabled seventeen so ingeniously. I better watch out for titles more carefully from now on. Super technique, masterful in fact. Bravo.
Lad -
Harden up at the hairdresser's, do ya?
And so do I, truth be told, as you do in this one, Bird. Delightfully light and airy and, as always, a bit of a turn at the end. Really nice.
Those two little questions are just perfect. And the dictions of strumming, drumming and soothing just hum along easily. I love the last three lines: avoiding old Freud for loving care of your hair, fairer and cheaper by far.
I must say that I try to hire haircutters in my neighborhood who speak Spanish only, so all I have to do is smile back and nod, no silly conversation needed. But now, after your poem, I'd better rethink and find me a dude with therapeutic hands and enjoy "the humanity of such / touch..."
I like this one immensely, W. A little cut (sorry) above the rest.
Lad
. Rewarded 4
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Head Case in Point
That other couch? It wouldn´t be the casting couch I suppose, Windhover? No I thought not. This hair-piece makes me yearn for the cosy familiarity of a regular shearer. No such luck and anyway up here no one has time or gives a follicle about cranial treatment below the scalp. The chattiest head-dresser I´ve experienced has been when I´ve clipped my curly wings in the UK. In fact now that I think about it my psycho-therapist hardly says anything either. Is it me?
Enjoyed your calm unforced rhyme as always and the phrases that linger fex:
"psyche evaluation with every
colour-rinse"
"...scissors
in her firm but gentle grip".
Ah, incisive scissor sisters; how invaluable they can be.
Cheers O Hirsute One.
gG
. Rewarded 4
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