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with hands that love her

Whistling winds
Make fallen leaves dance
One a long forgotten trail
Trees made wise by time
Hold in their arms life
And shelter ghost from sun and rain
At the end of the desolate path
Sleeps an empty house
Once so full of life
But now is passing
And in the hush tones of town folk
You can learn the tragic story
Of how love killed

It begins like most fairy tales
She was beautiful
And he must have her
He built for her a home
Logic told him that she was happy
Because he was
But love not being obedient
Washed her heart on anothers shore

An erie chill in the air that fate filled night wish to warn her
But she did not take heed
Love stretched, pushed, and pulled begat hate
Hate begat death
And with hands that loved her
He wished to break her spirit
But broke her neck instead

He already missed her
And looked forward to an eternity without intrusion
With his beloved
Her sister found him hung
Her strangled
An ironic picture of their union
Her on the floor
Him exalted high

I'm not sure of the flow of this poem and whether or not it makes sense

Sorry, you cannot respond to an archived poem

Reviews


  • William McGarvey silver member
    February 26, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    A dark story indeed.

    It flows well for the most part. The last two stanzas are a bit rough around the edges in some places. The first stanza is great, it drew me right in. Lines like “Trees made wise by time” and “And in the hush tones of town folk etc..” Terrific writing.

    Good work Trew

    Bill

    • Trew
      February 26, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks bill I'll work on those last stanzas