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The Love Poem of Mr. Hyde

Missing image

 

 

 

Some day
Dr. Jekyll will take
the elixir of
you,
let Mr. Hyde out of hiding -
then he’ll come, seeking


and he won’t play
games any more

he’ll write for you
and nobody else,
his words a blade
no longer hidden.

Then, with your own words,
you’ll offer him your throat -
and the poem that will be made

will be the most dangerous love poem ever written

 

 

 

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Comments

1 - 19 of 19
  • Gypsymuse
    September 15
    Edit | Reply

    This is almost good

    I like the everything but like the last five lines. I feel like everything was connected well except for those last lines.


    • Windhover gold member
      September 16
      Edit | Reply

      There is a subtle but important difference...

      ...between offering an opinion and making a pronouncement. Offering critique that is in some way useful is yet another thing. Few things make us look more foolish than trying to speak with an authority we do not possess. Such foolishness makes ME 'feel' that if you don't 'get' the last 5 lines, the shortcomings are more likely to be yours than the poem's.


  • ladyjanew gold member
    June 22

    Edit | Reply
    Nice violent images for a scary subject matter. Now I'll have to look under the bed to make sure Mr. Hyde isn't lurking under there.

    . Rewarded 4


    • Windhover gold member
      June 23
      Edit | Reply

      Theatre of the Mind

      Hey Lady J. Violent images? In my mind or YOURS?!! (evil laughter echoes around the auditorium) Beauty - and ugliness - are in the eye of the beholder! (more evil laughter - he sweeps his cloak and exits stage left)
      Thanks for reading and commenting. Glad it scared you! >W<


  • Ahkam silver member
    June 21
    Edit | Reply

    Beautiful

    Very nice Miss CIA..I really like the mistery of the words and the thought. nice write


    • Windhover gold member
      June 23
      Edit | Reply

      Miss?

      Miss CIA? Hey, I may be a bird but just the feathered kind! Glad you liked the mistery. Thanks for reading and commenting. >W<


  • sweetspiritonline
    June 4

    Edit | Reply

    :) i LOVE this one!

    i really want to know what Mr. Hyde write. this poem kinda leaves you wanting that and i like it. thank you for sharing this with me =]
    ~Anna

    . Rewarded 4

  • dave ochs silver member
    April 25

    Edit | Reply

    hey W.

    well this sure beats, let me count the ways I love thee, i think poems in general should be less Jeckell and more Hyde as you so elouquently stated. Illuminate us in darkness.
    dave

    . Rewarded 4

  • kittykat9597
    April 25
    Edit | Reply

    confused

    is this a parable meaning something else?explain so i 2 can understand


    • Windhover gold member
      April 25
      Edit | Reply

      That would be telling

      Well, yes I suppose it is Kittycat . But to explain it would be cheating. After all, it's the poet's job to deepen the mystery.......(eerie,evil laughter!) Seriously though, that WOULD be telling. Thanks for reading and asking. >W<


  • RoisinDubh
    April 25

    Edit | Reply
    Interesting concept, I loved it. I've always played with ideas of Jekyll and Hyde, though not in my poetry, and I think you pulled it off quite well. Keep up the good work!

    . Rewarded 4


  • adorasmum
    April 25

    Edit | Reply
    W, I liked the theme of this poem, it encapsulated the urgency and desire and danger that Mr Hyde would possess. There are several different factors being dealt with, the passion, the fact that women love a 'bad boy', but also the nature of Dr J, that all the malenolent parts of the human self is borne out in MrHyde.

    I liked the subject matter alot. As to the content. I liked the beginning. However, I wasnt sure about the simplicity of phrase to end the poem. I thought that in keeping with the rest of the poem, the last line could have been more descriptive, you seemed spent by the last line. Perhaps the words 'the most dangerous love poem ever written' is too bland in comparison to the rest of the poem.

    Despite the above, I liked it a great deal.

    . Rewarded 8


  • CinfullyDelicious silver member
    April 24
    Edit | Reply


    This is now my FAV of UR'S

    Woweeee >W<

    I am bloody speechless....lol

    Poetry..giving me a moment through someone elses eyes..at it's best


    WOW




    Cinful one..


    • Windhover gold member
      April 25
      Edit | Reply

      Thanks Cin

      Well thank you Cinful One! I thought this might be up your street. Appreciate the comment. Best. >W<


  • Zigfiend
    April 24

    Edit | Reply
    Violent, erotic, and blunt.
    I really can't think of much more to say. Your tone is great and perfectly fits the subject at hand.
    Great job.

    -Zig

    . Rewarded 4


  • celestialpie gold member
    April 24

    Edit | Reply
    This one's a hard-hitter, John. As a woman, it makes me feel a bit as if I've been yanked around by the hair-- but I like it and want more. Short, brutal, and sexy. And the photo's perfect.

    I second Ms. Caliente. Love it.

    XXX,
    Lauren

    . Rewarded 4


  • Windhover gold member
    April 24
    Edit | Reply

    < Thanks Cal

    I kinda like this one myself.

1 - 19 of 19