So she didn’t want
to go out with you
so you didn’t get
into the first three schools
of your choice
so you didn’t get
the job you applied for
so Steve Rubell
wouldn’t let you in
Studio 54
so you didn’t make
junior varsity football team
so she got up and moved
when you sat down
next to her
so Simon Cowell said
you where the worst singer
he’d ever seen
on American Idol
so you only got three votes
including yours
when you ran for
class president
so the loan officer
laughed when he
looked at your application
so the lawyer
wouldn’t take you
for a client
so the Army
wouldn’t let you in
special Forces
so they told you
you were too dumb
for the smart class
so she turned away
when you smiled at her
so you can’t remember
the last time your kids
called or wrote
so no one
spoke to you
all night
at the dinner party
so everyone
just kind of looked at you
when you made your proposal
at the business meeting
so the dog
tried to bite you
when you went
to pet him
so the New Yorker
didn’t accept
your short story
learn to take
rejection
like a man.
Comments
1 - 27 of 27
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Hilarious.
Everyman. Best RA -
are these all things that happened to you? i think i just hit the dave ochs "jackpot" here. these are answers to questions i never would have thought to ask. very cool but a silly poem
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I love this. Really, so what? This is like the annoyance I feel all the time at people who just don't take it. Nice structure too, it fits it real well.
Nicely done,
Adie -
OMG
THIS IS AWESOME AND SO VERY TRUE. NICELY WRITTEN -
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hey honeyfire
thanks for commenting, i appreciate it
dave
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as always.
hi, dave...your ending is perfect to what is the common diatribe of people who miss out on a lot of things in life...the lesson, take things in stride and man or not, be sure to have the guts to admit that life is not all ups, there have got to be down times...
way cool..
by the way, maybe you meant "were" instead of "where" in line 17...just a tiny typo in an insightful, straightforward, very honest poem...
kudos!
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hey leigh
you have a big heart.
thanks,
dave
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This is harsh and straight from the heart. I like it.
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hey ayreon
i take harsh as a great compliment. thanks so much.
dave
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I was skeptical when I first started reading. I had no idea where you were going. But you definitely made a strong point at the end! Granted it may be a bit sexist, but the idea itself, to swallow the rejection and move on, came across very clearly.
. Rewarded 6
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Glad I'm not a man! I like being all girly and being allowed to cry when I have to. And if all this happened to me, I'd cry too.
Nice comment on how men have to be so stony and stoic in this testosterone-fueled, competitive society. I feel sorry for guys sometimes. No wonder guys are encouraged to drink like fish.
Excellent poem! Great commentary!
. Rewarded 6
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hey lady J
thanks for the comment. i don't see anything wrong with crying either, the thing is not letting it stop you.
dave
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It's Simon Cowell not Cowart Dave but that apart the list of negative happenings were well selected with some humourous touches to this instructional address urging acceptance of one's lot. Frank
. Rewarded 4
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hey frank
thanks for the comment and the correction.
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I'm very new to poetry, but this piece really intrigued me. Intrigued? Okay. I thought it was interesting because it was so blunt and ... bam. Straightforward? Sure. It's so truthful and awesome ... great. :}
- SilverMilk -
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hey potato person
thanks for commenting. trust your instincts.
dave
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hey john
i think your unjustly criticizing for me for not handling criticism well. you've given me some pointers which i've been open to and besides if you or i or anyone posts a poem theres the caveat that some may not like it, and i'm sure you feel the same about your work. if you don't like a poem i write or feel it can be better please let me know.
as for cactus, he wasn't critical of this poem but of Love Poem (which you liked) and said it was pathetic, now that i take exception to, i'm usually polite when critiqing poems but when i looked at his Night and dreams it was really terrible and i felt i had the right to tell him so. look at some of the comments others left after mine, they seem to concur.
i guess what goes around comes around and that includes this site. hope this clears things up.
dave -
Open to suggestions?
Hey, Professor this sounds like you're in a bad mood but it makes a good point in your own inimitable style.
I see you clubbing Cactus to death here and for all I know he deserves it (certainly his English and the penmanship of his comment here leave a lot to be desired) . I've no intention of fighting his or anybody else's battles but it reminds me of something you once said to me about critics. 'Annihilate them all - what the fuck do THEY know?'. I learned something from that and it helped me be less anxious to please and willing to edit on the suggestions of others. A poem can't be written by commitee after all. But there IS almost always room for improvement and the fact that I've never, as far as I can recall, seen you adopt a suggestion or correction or even really discuss one doesn't encourage me to point out even the obvious mistakes in your own work any more - and that's not a good thing. If you won't accept negative comment or correction, it implies, right or wrong, that you're only posting here for adulation. I've always been prepared to give you that because I've always loved your stuff. But it could be better. THIS poem could be made better by the simple removal of a couple of mistakes and basic errors (technical, not artistic points - but they DO affect the artistic IMPACT of the piece). I've said this before. I suspect my saying it again will only antagonize you, which I'd rather not do. Then again, I can't always simply shut up and tell you you're great - especially because I think you are. Suggestions for improvement on request. My best to you as always. >W< -
simply use less
this poem is perfect example of people like u.i commented on u n u bursted.be sane.by the way poem r for some sense.what sense it bring i m don kno yet.atleast show sum way how to face such fallacy.poet used to motivate isnt??. Rewarded 4
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hey cactus
hey, you can barely write period, its really hard to understand your reply, you should learn to write before you tackle poetry, i think you should quit texting its making you speak in gibberish, but you are funny for a half-wit.
dave -
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hahaha.
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This spoke one thing only to me Dave LIFE
but in so many great little snippets of descriptions
this flowed through well form start to finish for me
Cindy
. Rewarded 4
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hey cinfully delicious
thanks as always, and don't take no crap from no one.
dave
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life sucks, sometimes...
Dave,
how deos a man take rejection? everyone needs a friend, ya know?
"so you can’t remember
the last time your kids
called or wrote"
this stanza hit home for me. i am the only one of five children that regularly speaks to our mom. i would never tell her, "learn to take rejection like a man," (even though she's obviously a woman ). she has her problems, and life definately has its struggles, but the last stanza just seemed cold hearted and prideful - criticizing on top of all this guys failures. haha. maybe all this he needs is a hug.
best,
Pap
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hey pap
thanks for commenting, of course i feel for someone in your moms situation and would never tell them, "so what" for something like that. but over-all the poem is suppossed to help people shrug off rejection and pick themselves up and keep on truckin, theres something to be said for sensitivity but theres also something to be said for saying oh well what the fuck.
dave -
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"...there's something to be said for sensitivity but threre's also something to be said for saying oh well what the fuck."
Amen, Dave!
As Tom Cruise's pot smoking friend in Risky Business said, "Sometimes you just gotta say, "What the fuck?""
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oh, i c
Dave,
yeah, i guess i didn't see it from your point of view. i thought the narrator had a criticizing tone of voice. but obviously you were implying a helpful, "keep on trukin" tone. my bad. i didn't catch that.
best,
Pap
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