Seas and waves are greeted by lily petals that dance in the wind.
Ultra-violet and white colours carried by a
summer breeze to travel back in history to
Ancient Egypt as the lotus flowers of the river
Nile's never-ending, nurturing flow on Mother Earth.
Naked to the eye, bright, fresh and washed by serene waves
ablaze by an otherworldly light of the gracefully joyful Seshen's giggle.
Please, tell me what you think!
Sorry, you cannot respond to an archived poemReviews
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Beautiful words, it is short but says a lot.
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Truthfully,
I like this poem but I think a shorter line format would help it come across better. Ofcourse opinions vary and I know
often poets have certain reasons for their choices in where they have their lin breaks. I'm learning different styles or at least trying. I've been told by many poets that shorter lines have more punch and are easier for the reader to digest. If you want to hear more about what I mean feel free to send me a message. I don't want you to think I'm a know it all. I'm not. I'm a know a little and learning. Nice poem.
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Wonderful, beautifully done word choice. It's short, but it gets to the point.
I kind of agree with Brian about the format though, but the format is still good as it is
. And poets know how they want to make their poems, so this choice is perfectly fine. Great Job!
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Great job. =]
It makes me rather jealous. =/ Not only can I never hope to achieve your brilliance, but my true name is just a river. =[
September 27
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