A wildcat fell in love
with a songbird
he'd hear her every night
as he prowled the forest
hunting
and feel himself drawn
to where such beautiful music
might be coming from
each night
after he'd eaten
he'd rest a while
close to her lodge
each night a little closer
unable to understand
why he was drawn
to something that made him
ache so
nevertheless
each night he'd go
to the same place
the nightingale grew used
to seeing him there
each morning
and she marvelled
at the power of him
the softness of his fur
and the pain that etched his face
even as he slept
she sang to him
more and more
because he made her
want to
one fateful morning
the songbird came to earth
to ask him why he always
looked so sad
when he saw what she was
the cat's soul was torn
in two
for he was born to kill
her kind
and the urge to do it was so
strong
yet how could he kill the singer
of his so-sweet nightingale song
so each night she sang
to ease his pain
and each night it grew stronger
until one night
driven half insane
he finally killed this thing he loved
and he never ate
again
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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Nature versus nurture - male versus female?
Windhover
the nature v nurture interconnected with male v female debates have been around since humans first understood the psychology of behaviour of any animal - her need to nurture - his need to conquer/kill. You have captured and brilliantly represented hundreds of years of psychological research in this well presented poem, although I feel inclined to call this a short story. Although I was expecting the kill to happen it still saddened me when he was true to his nature - I didn't expect the last line however which has such a powerful impact. This is not only great prose but a sensitively written insight into behaviour at its most basic. Great work.
Monica
language: 5, rhythm: 5, subject: 5, tone: 5, form: 4.
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Just a poem
Hi Angel and thank you for this very generous and considered comment. I'm flattered that you think it has psychological insights but I assure you it's just an attempt to discuss human feelings poetically. I think I'd call it a fable more than a short story but most of all I hope it's a poem! Thanks again. >W<
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really good. awesome. sad, but that's life, unfortunately. great job.
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Tragic!
Hey O. Thanks for the comment. Hopefully a tragedy can still be entertaining! >W< -
Thanks
Hi Enoq and thanks for your considered and detailed thoughts here. Much appreciated. >W<
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Good story
The story reminds me of the old parable about the scorpion and the fox. The moral was there that no matter how civil an animal can be it is still by nature an animal. I think the same moral applies here. I think the sentence structure and rhyming scheme could be chiseled a way a bit but then that may be me miss interpreting your meaning. I like the choice of the cat and bird because they are two great archetypes in the human mind for gentle and fierce. It is a well laid out story and I very much enjoyed it.
language: 4, rhythm: 1, subject: 5, tone: 2, form: 1.
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hey john
nice, reminds me of one of Aesops fables, thought there might be an irony here, that love makes us vulnerable or something. the last line's a killer.
dave -
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Ironic
Hey Professor. The irony is that it is often feelings of tenderness that get us 'killed'. That it reminds you of a fable is a great compliment. Thanks. >W<
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