love - which end
is it that matters?
coming or going
I know right
when I see it
& wrong when I
lose it
Comments?
Sorry, you cannot respond to an archived poemReviews
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Hmmmm
Thought provoking. At first glance, I thought it might be a bit awkward, but it is intriguing enough to compell multiple glances. So I think the initial awkwardness is effective. It is simple, and sort of has the feel of one of those --before and after-- puzzles on Wheel of Fortune. Only more poetically
.
While looking at it without the title in mind it seems to stand alone as a bit of a thought provoking riddle, but when you add the mood set by the title, it takes on more life.
I like short writes that make me look more than once and --ponder-- from multiple directions. This has a haiku-senryuish feel to it in that it prompts me to say hmmmm.
I think the layout is perfect as the eye can grab the entire piece in one look. That also makes the touch of awkward work better. No huge visual effort is required to rethink it several times.. Rewarded 1
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So simple
okay, I can't find much wrong with this, but there is no alliteration, it sounds sort of like my first poems, but as you write things improve. I really like this though, it makes sense.
-blackbirdhunter. Rewarded 1
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woohoo!
true. i do believe love is that simple. we just wanna complicate stuff a bit and think a bit and worry a bit more. well, its part of it all, i guess.
a good thought. i like it!
best regards.
Lynne. Rewarded 1
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i like this simple and to the point
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I think it very good.
It very true to human life very good. -
Hi Kevin!!
Seems the term "Short & sweet" was termed for this write before hand. It's true, simple and easy to understand.. That's what's it's really charm. Many can relate to this..
A good write that can be work upon a lil, but it's Ur choice. Seems good as it is also!!
Keep writing and keep smiling!
~ Tanya. Rewarded 1
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Howdy!
Short, sweet, and to the point.
I like how at first glace, it looks like a simple little poem, but the end suggests that you intended somthing much deeper than that.
You did an excelent job!
Thanks for sharin'!
Aileen C. Kendall. Rewarded 1
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I like that it's short!!
People underestimate the difficulty of writing short poems...I know, I've only ever written one and it was the hardest piece I've done. I really liked the form, and the subject (although I'm not normally too much into love) and the use of the "&" instead of "and" is really interesting...i like it.
The only thing i would say i feel detracts from it is the font...but i am a total simple person, so that's not necessarily the rule.
Anywho...good job!
Nienna. Rewarded 1
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Riddle-like but not
Kevin, just now digging a bit into your stuff after being a member only about a week. I just want, first, to thank you for a neat site; it's a pleasure to tool around in it.
Second, your "love - which end." It has a Zen koan quality to it, something that the mind can't crack open, but the inner spirit, in silent re-readings, can. I had to empty my mind, in other words, to open up your meaning, which to me is: winning or losing at love, if we're awake to ourselves, we grow, we learn.
But there's still something elusive in it -- which end is it that matters? I don't think that question is really resolved in the poem, and that's ok. Is winning or losing love ever really resolved? I don't think so.
Neat poem, neat question.
Lad (Pentameterman)
PS: How can I get my 3 poems in Allpoetry transferred to SharePoetry? I'm getting great comments from the SP poems, but nothing from the other. If there's a way to transfer, you'll have to guide me through it babystep-wise. I can get around the computer in only a general way, but tech details floor me. Pity me.
Thanks for your help.. Rewarded 1
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Nice Work
Really gets you in deep with this wording good job. -
Very nice, I like it
Good work. And the site is awsome.
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short and very impressive...i love it..so..philosphical..
very smartly and creatively put
Violet Moodswing
February 5, 2006
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