The night finds her dressed in her splendour
sparkling amber jewels tracing the long line
of her neck as it flows
from her bosom to her headland.
I know her – the way to her – and around her .
And she knows me.
She is an arm around me -
my depths and my shallows.
When the barometer falls
she moves closer
God’s harbinger and protector.
Her silhouette whispers
‘home’
her shape and presence define it.
A sleeping giant
she watches over the bobbing boats
of my thoughts .
I once thought her an island to the east
constant and changing - both.
Now she is my constant North,
harbour of my dreams-
my Howth.
Author notes
Began as a writing excercise in using familiar scenery to describe life. It is therefore local. Is it universal?
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I can see why you won that award
This is gorgeous. Just like who you were writing about. The imagery is fantastic - you see the peninsula and the woman. You can also feel from the imagery - the feeling of home - like how when you hug someone and get that feeling that you're "home"...where you belong. The best lines are 18 through 22. LOVE IT.
Why aren't my stars gold? -
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You wear glasses !
Windhover-colouredd ones! But I'm not complaining. Poems about my wife have always gone down well with most people - rather as she herself does! I'm glad you got a feeling of 'home'. Both she and the peninsula mean that to me.
I was a little surprised at your favourite lines. I thought they'd be confusing or irrelevant to a non-local. For many years I DID, mistakenly believe the peninsula was an island lying due east. In fact it lies due North . In good weather it looks far away and misty. Low pressure makes it look clear and well defined and 'closer' . So the locals say ' If Howth is near, the rain will soon be here'.
Love that you loved it.
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I love it...especially the reference to the land as a woman. It was great. Your imagery is riveting and spellbinding (which are pretty much the same thing but I was just in school so I'm kind of dead) and it was enchanting. I suppose it can be thought of as universal in some sense, although at the same time it isn't. I'll explain
I live in the arid semi-desert part of the US therefore all of your references to the sea have no sway over me as I've only seen the ocean once. But thinking in terms of relating a loved-one and their personalities to familiar landscape I see exactly where it would come from. The mountains here become a perfect tool to do such and reading your poem in fact gave me great inspiration to do such if just for myself. So in that sense it is universal (I dunno if that's what you were looking for but that's what I found...)
It was beautiful, I'll have to print it and put it up in my locker at school to make the day slightly more bearable til i can come read lovely poetry again!
Admiringly...
Nienna. Rewarded 4
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Synchronicity !
Hi Nienna and thanks for the glowing review. Can I refer you to my reply below , headed 'I blush easily K. ' as an appropriate response and an explanation of where this one came from and why your review got 5 stars. You could almost take that reply as addressed to yourself! I really was most gratified by what you said.
But I'm enthralled to see the image you use as your signature. I attend a writers group every 2 weeks and last week I had to supply the 'headings' for the free-write excercise. I found that very one on google and just loved it so I gave it to the group as one of their choices. I also used it as a theme myself. I'll send you what I wrote.
This has been fun. Thanks so much. >W< -
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That is snazzy! I don't know what those little stars are for but ah well, five is a good number, so I'll say thanks!
Yes, I actually went and changed my face after telling you about the mountains. I really am hugely inspired by your poem, and...well, when the whells start turning there's no way to stop them. I'm going on a trip very soon and there's an eight hour flight and five hour layover so we'll see what boredom incites. It's great to see those coincidences...they're creepy and fascinating at the same time...spooky!
I would love to see what you wrote! And if you ever feel so inclined I would love to have some of your expertise in the form of a comment on some of my more imagery-laden pieces...three come to mind "Desert Eden" "Death Aria" (though that's a can of worms in and of itself) and "Midnight Zenith" (I think that's what it's called...wow, can't even remember my own poem's name, that's kind of sad). Anywho, look forward to hearing from you!
Nienna
PS Just remembered...I was tempted to choose another picture for my face but was DRAWN to that one...wow! -
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Oh, wow, that was supposed to be "wheels" not "whells"...school is bad for kids, I think!
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Synchronicity !
Hi Nienna and thanks for the glowing review. Can I refer you to my reply below , headed 'I blush easily K. ' as an appropriate response and an explanation of where this one came from and why your review got 5 stars. You could almost take that reply as addressed to yourself! I really was most gratified by what you said.
But I'm enthralled to see the image you use as your signature. I attend a writers group every 2 weeks and last week I had to supply the 'headings' for the free-write excercise. I found that very one on google and just loved it so I gave it to the group as one of their choices. I also used it as a theme myself. I'll send you what I wrote.
This has been fun. Thanks so much. >W<
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am humbled by your work. you use such wonderful images in all your poems that I cant help but just stop and think wow. the fact that ou can weave these thoguhts into a grand masterpiece of poetry like this amazes me. I hope to read many more and grow with you as we write more and more wonderful poems
~~~Abhi~~~
. Rewarded 4
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Thank you Abhi .
Your comment is too flattering for me to say more . Thanks again. -
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no problemo
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i started writing this review a couple days ago and it some how got erased.
so i'll try again.
i don't know if you know this but your greatest pieces of writing( i'm being objective here) are those that compare nature or the natural environment to some human quality ( usually someone you care about)or feature like shiver, prey for instance and a whole heap of others.
the description in this piece is utterly magnificent.
you place an image of sophisticated, well-to-do, down to earth lady in my head, a lady you love.
honestly though i have a feeling that although your refering to the Nothern Peninsuala- there is still a reference to your wife in here( or you were thinking about her when you wrote this) because you write it as though you are oh to familar with this "silhouette"
there is no need for excessive punctuation but
between " splendour and sparkling" there is need .
After "both in lines 19 as well.
. Rewarded 4
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I blush easily K. !
Wow , what can I say but thanks a million! I'm a little surprised by the 'glow' of this critique . The poem was an excercise in using visual imagery to describe personal traits ( good or bad) in someone you know. So good catch .We were looking out over Dublin Bay which is surrounded by the Howth Peninsula . At night sodium street lights burn orange in a steady line out around the bay until they reach the headland directly across from the port town where I live. I cycle out there most weeks and know every bump in the road and contour of the landscape. When I travel to Britain ( quite a lot recently) , the peninsula is an unmistakeable landmark from the air OR the sea.It tells me I'm very definitely 'home'.So it wasn't hard to turn it into my wife.I'm very gratified by the image you got of her . Pretty close except for the 'well-to-do' bit (street lights not jewels I'm afraid ! ) As for the punctuation I am told by my betters that all but absolutely essential punctuation and capitals should be kept to a minimum in the interests of 'flow' and the line breaks should be used to indicate most of the pauses . But just for you I'll put a coma in !
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you lucky devil, you
dave -
you lucky devil you
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*speechless*
damn your amazing talent. i dont even know what to say. this was fantastic. what method do you use when beginning your work? i try to let things happen naturally and end up crafting that raw word into what i can, but you work seems to flow so easily. any advice for a newcomer to verse?. Rewarded 4
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Also speechless!
Wow , what can I say about such a glowing ensordement? Thank you might be a start - so thanks a million ! I can't presume to tell you anything about poetry I'm afraid as I'm a complete amateur myself .All I know is what I like . If I have any advice to give to any writer of any kind it is this . Read (and do) Julia Cameron's book 'The Artists Way'.It will change your life. I would never have written anything without it. Thanks again for the endorsement. I'll try and look your work up again soon. W.
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